What Are The Odds- Adriana Lima Grabs a Crotch

I saw these photos and it got me to thinking, "Do you think you have better odds of winning the lottery, getting hit by lightning or ending up as this luckiest smuck in the world who for the rest of his life will be breaking out this photo of super model to the world Adriana Lima holding his crotch for all to see.

One day in around fifty years, this douchebag will be sitting in a park somewhere telling some seventeen year old man-whore for the eight hundredth time.

"See kid, she was a super model, biggest in the world at the time, and they asked her to grab my crotch for a photo shoot we were doing at the magazine. And guess what she did? She grabbed my crotch, it was the best three seconds of my entire life

God, it makes me sick. I mean I was available while this shoot was happening, why couldn't they have called me.

Anyway, wining the lottery: Your actual odds of winning the lottery depend on where you play, but single state lotteries usually have odds of about 18 million to 1 while multiple state lotteries have odds as high as 120 million to 1.

Here are the rest of some weird odds:

Odds of bowling a 300 game: 11,500 to 1

Odds of getting a hole in one: 5,000 to 1

Odds of getting canonized: 20,000,000 to 1

Odds of being an astronaut: 13,200,000 to 1

Odds of winning an Olympic medal: 662,000 to 1

Odds of an American speaking Cherokee: 15000 to 1

Odds that a person between the age of 18 and 29 does NOT read a newspaper regularly: 3 to 1

Odds that an American adult does not want to live to age 120 under any circumstances: 3 to 2

Odds of injury from fireworks: 19,556 to 1

Odds of injury from shaving: 6,585 to 1

Odds of injury from using a chain saw: 4,464 to 1

Odds of injury from mowing the lawn: 3,623 to 1

Odds of fatally slipping in bath or shower: 2,232 to 1

Odds of drowning in a bathtub: 685,000 to 1

Odds of being killed on a 5-mile bus trip: 500,000,000 to 1


Okay, seeing is how these are the first pictures ever captured of Adriana Lima holding some guys crotch and there are about five billion people in the world, the odds of Adriana Lima holding your pocket power tool is around five billion to one and the odds of you dying in your bathtub are 2,333 to 1.

God has a pretty sick sense of humor.